4:15

This post really has no real meaning. I guess I can say the same for all of my other ones haha. It's really late and I have absolutely no clue what I'm doing up. I miss my famiy. I miss my homies. I need to make changes, and quick. I mean really, the changes have started...it's just, it's taking too long haha. I want them to happen already. Buuuut I gotta work with what I'm given, right? Right. No point in sulking around and doing nothing, right? Right. Happiness depends upon ourselves. Gotta run that shit 'till my knees fall off. See ya in the morning!

real shit

When a tree falls in the forest, with no one to hear it,
It doesn't make the faintest sound -
When a person falls in love, with no one there to mirror it
It doesn't weigh a single pound.


-D. Allen

ars gratio artis

Haha, can I get a hell yeah??

Today was pretty inspiring. Went to this dope ass place that made me realize a few things. One of them being fuck the luxurious life. Actually let me rephrase that...Fuck the mainstream "luxurious" life. I will lead a luxurious life in my eyes. Friends, family, music, maybe a little bit of herb haha. Maybe.

Straight to the point: I'm going to do what I love. Everybody should. What the FUCK is the point of living this life and doing mindless self-indulging tasks your whole life that in the end, will never matter anyway? I choose to stand apart from that crowd. I will join myself, along with thousands of other people who believe in truly living their lives to the fullest. I choose to walk the path of love.

lovers in japan; reign of love

"Lovers, keep on the road you're on. Runners, race until the race is run. Soldiers, you've got to soldier on. Sometimes even the right is wrong. Tonight we're gonna run dreaming of the Osaka sun; Dreaming of when morning comes."

aintathug: everybody in this world

aintathug: no matter whom they are

aintathug: they deserve better than what they are given

homies

The homie J-Stacks is trying to change my life right now and I'm pushing him away.

I think that's my problem? But at the same time I'm not sure. Maybe our beliefs are different. After all if there's one thing in life that can be counted as the ultimate factor, it's perspective. Who knows?

We'll see.

my mind, latley

Stackin Cheese:
When is this ever not on anybody's mind? Especially these days. I think it's pretty ridiculous how America runs on it. Peep it...so, we go to school starting at a young age. Why? To educate ourselves & I'm fine with that. But why do we educate ourselves? To get a job. Why do we get a job? To make money. Why do we make money? Because it's is literally impossible to support yourself or anybody you love in this country without making money. You can't even make an honest living without money. Hahahaha. Ridic, right? But that's the way things are & it's going to take more than a miracle to change that.



Amsterdam:
So me and the homie Dino decided that by the age of 25, we're gonna hit up this mother fucker! I really hope we do cause this would be super legit. I think it's a fairly attainable goal considering the fact that I'm only 19 and there's plenty of time. Haha, wish us luck!



Corbin H. Butler:
My dude is holdin' it down. For real, you all need to jump on this train before you're too late. Get your broke ass to scrape up $5 and ask this man for a copy of "Villain" No joke, shit's clean! If you're lucky, he might send you his mixtape too. For now, jump on "Chipotle" Rip it, burn it, get it however the fuck you can and bump this shit in your car haha.

Check it: http://www.myspace.com/dabeanbeatnet

come through?

aintathug: i dont deserve any of this, andrea

aintathug: you know?

aintathug: but somehow at random times in my life

aintathug: when i least expect it

aintathug: people come through for me

aintathug: and turn my head around

aintathug: a complete 180 degree turn

aintathug: its so crazy.

your smirks: dude that's amazing though, that's what life's all about and shit

your smirks: everybody has their ups and downs, and i think you just had a bunch of downs in a row

aintathug: yes ma'am

your smirks: but yeah dude that's super cool that you're doing well and shit


I'm not sure if the person I was talking about in that AIM conversation with Dre will ever read this...

But thank you. I hope if you are reading this, you know that I'm talking about you. You've proven to me that amidst life and all it's craziness; in it's entirety, there's always some sort of good lurking just around the corner. I don't think you'll every fully comprehend the hope you've instilled in me. Thank you.

I owe you my life.

cynthia miraflor trillo:

I'm not sure where to begin. I can sit here on this chair for hours typing away at everything that's accumulated over the years since you've been gone. I guess I should start where my problem begins: your death.
I mean, really mom, I think it's fucking ridiculous that you were taken away the way you were. I hate it. I hate how I was the only one not at the house during your passing. I hate how when Rachel came walking onto the field to tell me, I already knew what she was going to say. I hate how the walk from the car to the door of your room was the longest walk of my life. Some say hate is a strong word. In that case, hate defines this situation. In fact, it even created a new hate that sprung up from this: my hate for God.
If this mother fucker is real, how on this God-forsaken Earth could he have done that? You were the most religious person I knew, mom. In a situation like yours, you had every right to be depressed. To be angry. To be bitter. But for some strange reason, this "God" was helping you take life one day at a time. You thrived off him. Ahhh, but what did you get in return? Nothing. As a matter of fact, if I rememeber correctly your situation got progressively worst as the years passed. I'm not sure how you stuck with him...I'm still trying to figure it out.
You know what I miss about you the most? Talking with you. Remember how we used to just lay in bed together and talk? Jesus Christ mom...I swear I would fucking give anything in this world for 5 minutes of talking time with you. You wanna know something? Since you left, I haven't found anybody that I could open up to the way I did with you. In fact because of this, I think I've started to have trust issues with people. I mean I can honestly say that I haven't TRULY opened up to anybody in 6 years. Every once in a while I'll open up a bit to somebody close, like Rachel or Chelsea. Or even Auntie and Kristen. But never never never never I will speak to somebody again the way I did with you. You know what it is? I believe it's that level of comfortability that is missing. You made me feel like anything and everything was ok. You never onced judged. Never once assumed.
I'm sure you'd be disappointed in the fact that I'm not religious at all today. I don't even really believe in God anymore. The hardest thing about that is that if I'm going to believe that, then I have to accept that fact that I may very well never see you again. When people mourn over loved one's death, I think most of them find a little comfort in the fact that they believe they will see them again in the 'afterlife.' I can't be a hypocrite and think one thing and then believe another. I have to accept it. I will never see you again. It's one of the hardest issues I've ever faced in my life. Who knows though. Maybe as I grow older my beliefs will change. Maybe as I grow older I will find somebody who I can open up to the way I did with you. Maybe as I grow older I will accept your passing for what it was. Maybe as I grow older I will find comfort in the fact that you're no longer in pain. And maybe, juuuuuust maybe, I will see you again. You will forever remain in my heart.

hey

Help me out